


I'm Not A Child

by Jetfires_girl



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Childhood Trauma, Drama, M/M, One-Sided Attraction, Possible Character Death, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-10-08
Updated: 2015-01-02
Packaged: 2018-02-20 08:42:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,415
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2422412
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jetfires_girl/pseuds/Jetfires_girl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>At first, Iceland's nightmares were only in his dreams... now they're not only his reality... but Norway's as well as he slowly starts to lose his grip on his patience's and Iceland's... SLOW UPDATES BUT THIS WILL UPDATE NONE THE LESS!!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. In the beginning...

**Author's Note:**

> HUMAN NAMES USED!!! for those who don't know them...
> 
> Iceland: Emil  
> Denmark: Matthias  
> Norway: Lukas  
> Finland: Toni  
> Sweden: Berwald
> 
> Italics means either dreaming or though process

_Does this hallway go on forever…_

 

_Where is he…_

 

_Don’t tell me he’s gone…_

 

_He wouldn’t leave me…_

 

_Where did he go…_

 

_I’m scared…_

 

_…._

 

_There he is…_

 

_Why is walking away…_

 

_Don’t go…_

 

_Stop…_

 

_I can’t reach him…_

 

_“NORWAY”_

* * *

 

 

“GAAAAH”

Iceland shot up from his sleep, sweating, and tears running done his face. That dream again… no… that memory again. For the past 2 months, every other night, he’s been re-living that day again; the day Norway left for Sweden’s and left him with Denmark. Even though that happened so long ago, the day traumatized him greatly. He was very young when that happened. Feeling too hot to lay back down, Emil got up from bed and went to the kitchen to get him some coffee.

Unlike the other countries, the personification of Iceland lived in a 1 bedroom apartment barely even 700 sq ft. He never did see the need for a larger home since it was just him and as long as he had fast internet he was happy where ever. Sipping his coffee, he walked out to his tiny balcony and enjoyed the view from his place on the 3rd level his apartment was on.

“Tsk…. Why…”

_Why do I keep dreaming about it… I don’t want to remember it…_

Normally he would have these conversations with Mr. Puffin but he was sleeping soundly on his perch. Now those were days he wants to remember, before the Nordics, before governments, when it was just him and the puffins.

Finishing up his coffee he went back inside, he set his cup down, sat himself on his couch, and opened his laptop. When he couldn’t sleep, he would join the many people who scrolled at night on Tumblr. Sometimes, Prussia would message him and ask stupid questions that made him smirk. Tonight though there was none… just him and the refrigerator tag. As he was scrolling he heard a noise come from his laptop like a message being sent, but he couldn’t find the source. He kept scrolling liking and reblogging pictures, the alert noise still going off. Finally he closed all his tabs only to find out it was his skype going off. Frustrated that he closed out his spot on tumblr for nothing, he got on skype to see who messaged him.

“ugh I don’t really want to be talking with you right now…”

Denmark had spammed their chat with “WHY ARE AWAKE” “IT’S PAST YOUR BEDTIME” “GET OFF TUMBLR” “AT LEAST STOP REBLOGGING FRIDGES” etc. He made himself invisible and got back on tumblr. He should have just signed off because almost the second he went invisible Denmark called him for video chat. Sighing, he grudgingly answered the call.

“HEY Emil why are you awake?? Isnt it like 3 am in your country”

“3:58 and I that nightmare again so I don’t really want to talk”

“Emil you know you can talk to me about it… I don’t like you being upset and I can’t something about it”

“I’m sorry… I just…. “

“GAH I wish I was at your house so I can just… wrap my arms around you and hug you and make ALL those nasty nightmares go away”

“….. I’m not a kid Matthias… please don’t treat me like one… I already get enough of that from Lukas”

“WHICH BY THE WAY WHY ARE YOU IGNORING HIM YOU KNOW I’M THE ONE THAT HAS TO HEAR ABOU IT”

“I know and I’m sorry… again”

“Hey no I’m sorry it’s just he’s been really worried about you cuz I don’t know… you haven’t talked to him in two months”

“Yeah…. “

“…. Are your nightmares about him?”

“…….”

“………Emil?”

“Sorry… yeah… yeah they are…”

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“Not really”

“Alright then, WELL I’m goin to bed now. Me and Lukas are hangin out tomorrow and if I don’t meet him on time this time I’ll have to pay for lunch AGAIN”

“He’s goin to make you pay anyways you know that… well bye”

“GOODNIGHT”

Emil closed his laptop and set it off to the side. He didn’t want to go back to bed, but his body was tired and his eyes were heavy. Regardless of what his mind was saying, he went to bed.

_…I don’t want to dream please… don’t let me dream…_


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Denmark and Norway have a... sorta heated lunch~

" _SHIT"_

It was 12:30…. Thirty minutes late…

Matthias's meeting ran long than normal. They were discussing the upcoming world meeting and what all needed to be presented and discussed with the other countries. They were about to finish early when his boss brought up the fact that some numbers were low or something and they spend an extra hour, one he needed, on talking about the subject. As much as he wished he would, Lucas won't let him hear the end of it about 'If you make plans, keep to them' and something or another. Lucas was only going to be in his country for only a few more hours, as he had his own affairs in his country as well. Though it was strange that he of all people would ask HIM out to lunch. It could just be that 'since I'm here might as well' thing but he sounded more serious than normal. Maybe something happened between him and Emil… all the more reason he needed to be on time today.

He ran out the door of the office building haphazardly made his way to his car. The second he started his car his phone went off… it was Lucas.

"HEY NORGE, I JUST GOT OUT I'M ON MY WAY DON'T LEAVE I'M SORRY"

"Matthias its been thirty-"

"I KNOW I'M ON MY WAY"

He hung up his phone sped off to meet Lucas.

" _He's mad at me GAAAh everytime"_

* * *

Matthias arrived at the café in near record time. He found Lucas sitting outside at one of the tables.

"Lucas I'm sooooo sorry my meeting ran over, traffic, things don't work"

He landed in a chair opposite from Lucas with a big 'unf'.

"I guess I can let you off this time… this time"

"GAAH thanks norge"

Matthias ordered some lunch and began to relax, finally no lecture on keeping time. He looked over at Lucas, he looked tired and sad, did something really happen between him and Emil?

"Hey Lucas, other than spending time with yours truly, why did you want to meet up"

Truth is that's all Lucas did want, to spend time with him. He missed when they lived together and just hung out, but he did call him out for a reason.

"I wanted to know… if you talked to Emil lately"

Their lunch arrived just as he finished the question. Matthias smiled, he had a feeling this is way he called him. He was happy to know he was still worried about Emil. Emil has been really introverted for centuries now but mostly towards Lucas. He understood that, yes he was pretty over-protective Emil being his age, but to almost cut him off completely.

"Yeah I talked to him last night… well early this morning really"

Lucas looked up from his lunch.

"Did… did he say anything… about me?"

"hm.. um… well he… didn't go into it all.. but something about dreams really"

"oh I see"

Lucas looked down at his meal again. Emil always told him to stop treating him like a child but to stop talking to him over a dream. Nothing made since anymore, he was more worried for Emil now more than ever, or maybe… he was just overreacting a bit… no…

"Matthias?"

"Yeah"

"…. What are you doing tomorrow"

"well it's the start of my vacation so-"

"So you and I are going to visit Iceland tomorrow"

Matthias nearly choked on his drink.

"ack… What… uh…"

"Don't you try and get out of this… I've given Emil enough time to himself… I'm worried about him and I want to hear it from him that he's ok… not from you or Toni or Berwald but him"

"um… Norge… I think you might be jumpin the gun here… maybe I can call him on skype and you can listen in or something"

"NO!"

He bolted up from his chair knocking it over.

"Tomorrow you and I are going to visit him and there's no way you can talk me out of this"

With that he gathered his things and left leaving the nervous and uneasy dane behind.

"… oh man… this isn't good at all…"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oops that took a while!! Sorry i promise the next chapter will be longer... But please leave a comment and tell me how i did... i can only improve from it!! ^^


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